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Ham Sandwich Being Led Into Grand Jury |
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By Charlotte Webb, Staff Writer |
May 3, 2006
Indictment Against Ham Sandwich Dismissed - Kelly Burke Stupified
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Ham Sandwich Being Led Into Grand Jury |
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By Charlotte Webb, Staff Writer |
A Superior Court Judge dismissed the indictment against a ham sandwich today, stupefying Houston County District Attorney Kelly Burke. Earlier this year Burke indicted a ham sandwich for unlawful possession of spicy brown mustard, saying that it sent a powerful message to ham sandwiches everywhere that Houston County will not tolerate spicy brown mustard. The Court's order today noted that neither spicy brown mustard nor being a ham sandwich were crimes in Georgia. Burke vowed to appeal and possibly re-indict.
In related news, Superior Court Judge Harry Altman dismissed five counts of harassing phone calls and one count of assault in an Albany case in which Burke was appointed Special Prosecutor.
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As you probably know, this site is a little thing we like to call satire, it is not the Houston Home Journal nor is it District Attorney Kelly Burke's site. It is however dedicated to illustrating the surreal nature of life with King Kelly, DA of Houston County. If you need this footnote to tell you this, you either rode the short bus to school or you are Kelly Burke. This site was created on a private computer in a private home, on a private internet connection, to a privately owned domain. |
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