DA Burke is incensed over Napoleon Dynamite (pictured above)
February 1, 2005
Burke Indicts Dynamite!
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DA Burke is incensed over Napoleon Dynamite (pictured above) |
Charlotte Webb - Staff Writer
Houston County District Attorney Kelly Burke today announced charges brought against the entire cast and crew of the motion picture, Napoleon Dynamite. Burke claims that the movie wrongfully appropriated his likeness and his entire high school experience. Said Burke, "tall goofy readhead with a perm and a polyester suit a coincidence, I think not!" "It's like I have been raped." Burke has also ordered that all prints of the movie and dvds in Houston County be seized and destroyed. When asked about the propriety of trampling the first amendment with the state's police power, especially in light of cases such as Hustler Magazine, Inc. et al. v. Jerry Falwell, Burke replied, "If people only did something that they knew would come to pass, a lot of innovative things would never happen."
As of press time, Larry Flynt was unavailable for comment.
For the story behind the story click here.
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As you probably know, this site is a little thing we like to call satire, it is not the Houston Home Journal nor is it District Attorney Kelly Burke's site. It is however dedicated to illustrating the surreal nature of life with King Kelly, DA of Houston County. If you need this footnote to tell you this, you either rode the short bus to school or you are Kelly Burke. This site was created on a private computer in a private home, on a private internet connection, to a privately owned domain. |
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