surreal - adj 1: characterized by fantastic imagery and incongruous juxtapositions;  2: resembling a dream

Surrealism Advisory System

Coping with the surreal nature of Houston County is a daily problem.  We hope that the Surrealism Advisory System can help.

Understanding the  Surrealism Advisory System

1. Low Condition (Green). This condition is declared when there is a low risk of surrealism attacks. County departments and agencies should consider the following general measures in addition to the agency-specific Protective Measures they develop and implement:

• Refining and exercising as appropriate preplanned Surrealism Protective Measures;

• Ensuring personnel receive proper training on the Home County Security Advisory System and specific preplanned department or agency Protective Measures; and

• Institutionalizing a process to assure that all facilities and regulated sectors are regularly assessed for vulnerabilities to surrealism attacks, and all reasonable measures are taken to mitigate these vulnerabilities.

2. Guarded Condition (Blue). This condition is declared when there is a general risk of surrealism attacks. In addition to the Protective Measures taken in the previous Threat Condition, County departments and agencies should consider the following general measures in addition to the agency-specific Protective Measures that they will develop and implement:

• Checking communications with designated emergency response or command locations;

• Reviewing and updating emergency response procedures; and

• Providing the public with any information that would strengthen its ability to act appropriately.
   

3. Elevated Condition (Yellow). An Elevated Condition is declared when there is a significant risk of surrealism attacks. In addition to the Protective Measures taken in the previous Threat Conditions, County departments and agencies should consider the following general measures in addition to the Protective Measures that they will develop and implement:

• Increasing surveillance of critical locations;

• Coordinating emergency plans as appropriate with nearby jurisdictions;

• Assessing whether the precise characteristics of the threat require the further refinement of preplanned Protective Measures; and

• Implementing, as appropriate, contingency and emergency response plans.

4. High Condition (Orange). A High Condition is declared when there is a high risk of surrealism attacks. In addition to the Protective Measures taken in the previous Threat Conditions, County departments and agencies should consider the following general measures in addition to the agency-specific Protective Measures that they will develop and implement:

• Coordinating necessary security efforts with law enforcement agencies or any National Guard or other appropriate armed forces organizations;

• Taking additional precautions at public events and possibly considering alternative venues or even cancellation;

• Preparing to execute contingency procedures, such as moving to an alternate site or dispersing their workforce; and

• Restricting threatened facility access to essential personnel only.

5. Severe Condition (Red). A Severe Condition reflects a severe risk of surrealism attacks. Under most circumstances, the Protective Measures for a Severe Condition are not intended to be sustained for substantial periods of time. In addition to the Protective Measures in the previous Threat Conditions, County departments and agencies also should consider the following general measures in addition to the agency-specific Protective Measures that they will develop and implement:

• Increasing or redirecting personnel to address critical emergency needs;
• Assigning emergency response personnel and pre-positioning and mobilizing specially trained teams or resources;
• Monitoring, redirecting, or constraining transportation systems; and
• Closing public and government facilities.

As you probably know, this site is a little thing we like to call satire, it is not the Houston Home Journal nor is it District Attorney Kelly Burke's site.  It is however dedicated to illustrating the surreal nature of life with King Kelly, DA of  Houston County.  If you need this footnote to tell you this, you either rode the short bus to school or you are Kelly Burke.    This site was created on a private computer in a private home, on a private internet connection, to a privately owned domain.